So, let me get this straight: I'm supposed to apply my eyeliner using the back of a Pulp CD as a mirror. Riiiiiiiight. Why aren't there any decent mirrors in this place? Are you sitting shiva? Are you the Beast from Beauty and the Beast and you can't stand to see your reflection? This is nuts!
I hate putting on makeup at your house. The only mirror in here is in the bathroom and it's dusty and streaked, like Hank Moody's Porche. Not to be a diva, but this mirror situation isn't working for me.
For instance, without a full-length mirror, I can't tell if my outfit looks presentable. When I get to work and take a good look at myself in the ladies' room, I realize that I could be Shakes the Clown's understudy! My shirt is askew. My buttons are buttoned weird. One pant leg is tucked into a sock. I'm surprised no one hauled me off to a mental institution because I clearly resemble an extra from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
As a head's up, this is totally your fault. Seriously, they have mirrors at Target. They're not expensive. Invest in one.