June 24, 2010

Things I'm Terrible At: Remembering Names

There are a ton of things that I'm terrible at, but remembering people's names is pretty much in the Top 3. It's the worst because people get SO OFFENDED that I can't keep names straight.

But, it has nothing to do with them; I can't remember anyone's names! It's not like I made a note in my day planner to forget a person's name. I've never had a conscious thought like: "Lucy can go get fucked because I just don't have enough room in my huge head to keep track of something as useless as her name."

Confession: I especially have a problem telling girls who are 5'7 with brown hair and glasses apart. They all look the same to me. They're all named Jen and they all having boring jobs. Or, at least, that's how it seems.

When it comes to guys, my memory gets hazy sometimes. I know that we've met. Somewhere. Maybe once. Possibly more. I'll squint my eyes. I'll cock my head to the side, studying his face. Yes, we've DEFINITELY met before. I think.

All of a sudden, I start talking like I'm a really bad psychic. "What's your name? No, don't tell me! I'm sensing an "r". Rob? Ryan? No, wait. Richa-"

He starts shaking his head no as I'm sounding out the word.

"Richa-ussel. Richussel. Russel. It's Russel, right?" I let out the stupidest smile as if to say, "Please don't hate me because I can't remember anything. Seriously, I'm terrible at it."

So, guys, go easy on me if I forget your name. I'll take some Ginkgo Biloba or something (no I won't.)


Erfs said...

I am also the absolute worst at this! I feel especially horrible about my name remembering deficiency because I have a really unique name that no one seems to forget (once they've learned it). Ugh.

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