October 15, 2010

Don't Take This The Wrong Way, But Our Kids Would Be Straight-Up Stupid


Hmmm. How do I say this. He's a few sandwiches short of a picnic, if you know what I mean. His suggestions never make sense. His reasoning seems cloudy. And, he gets mad when I use "big words" that he says he doesn't understand. I look into his eyes and it seems like the lights are on, but no one's home.

I can overlook these things because he wears cool jeans and has nice hair, but then I think about what would happen if, god forbid, I were to get pregnant by him. That's when I realized that I couldn't risk it because our kids would make Ralph Wiggum look like Aristotle. They'd be the kids in the back of the classroom eating paste and drooling, decked out in helmets and child leashes. The thought of my gene pool swirling with his makes me terrified for humanity's future. I feel like this is some sort of Terminator plotline waiting to happen.

This isn't a random guy or a snap decision; I've known him since high school. And, he was kinda stupid in high school too. I'm not elitist and I don't care the he's not academically inclined, but I can't ignore it at the same time. Nope. Best to just step away and turn him down. It's for the best.

9 comments:

Anna said...

By the way, I'm not being a jerk in this post. If my high school friends knew who I was talking about, they'd back me up here. Courtney knows. She was there. Haha!

Rachel said...

Love this post. Agree and made me laugh a bit too!!

Hooli said...

My friends know that I really dig a guy when the words "He has REALLY good genetics" come out of my mouth. And usually I mean that as, when both of our genes combined our kids would be cute and bright (my nightmare is to have an ugly, stupid child).

Anonymous said...

Modern dating: eugenics isn't just for the Nazis anymore!

Anna said...

Um, not wanting to procreate with someone because he isn't smart isn't the same as not wanting to procreate with someone because of his racial attributes. People from all races can be stupid. It's not the same thing.

Jonesy said...

Not gonna lie; I don't think I could go out on more than a single date with someone who isn't bright. I can be friends with less-than-smart people, but my pillow talks revolves around having someone who will have an interesting conversation with me... and I find a good portion of dumb people very boring. Sorry.

Alan said...

That's just plain frightening when a girl's thinking babies like that.

Even typing "babies" gave me pause for a second.

*shudder*

Anonymous said...

eugenics isn't just about race, it can also be about intelligence or wealth, etc. but comparing this to eugenics, is for want of a better word, kind of stupid. sexual selection and eugenics are not the same thing.
if some authority were to tell anna that she wasn't permitted to mate with this person because he isn't intelligent enough, when she actually really wanted to, and to make sure of it sterilised one or both of them... then that could probably be compared to eugenics.

Anonymous said...

the hottest guy from my high school was one of those 'hot until he opens his mouth' situations. got confused using any big words, couldn't pronounce anything right. he was very sweet and never had a problem with the ladies, he had a body that did not quit. he has a child now who is super adorable but i have to bet the kid may be smarter than him :/

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