July 27, 2011

Things In His House That Make Me Sad: Wavy Mirrors From Ikea

Oh god, I hate these fucking wavy mirrors. I can't stand seeing them tacked up on his wall like a shiny tribute to cooked bacon. How am I supposed to fix my makeup in these with a straight face? They look like armor plates for giant tapeworms.

I can't believe this design has not only endured for so long, but it's wound its way into so many guys' living rooms. Can someone explain their appeal to me? Because having mirrors that look like instructions for using a hand dryer in a public restroom isn't the best look for any abode.

And nothing screams, "my mom bought these for me freshman year of college while we went to Ikea for the first time ever" than these bad boys. They should've been ditched along with his Adidas flip flops the second he received his undergrad diploma.

All I'm saying is that I don't need his mirrors to remind me of Taylor Swift's hair. They're goofy, like owning a copy of Howard the Duck on DVD. No one needs to own that movie in a modern format just like no one needs to see these wave-tastic Ikea mirrors. I'm taking a stand on this one, fellas! The only thing left waving will be me when I chuck these shitty mirrors to the curb.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey! Watch what you say about bacon!!

SwellMLE said...

Oh, Shmitten, you always make me howl with your perfectly crafted paragraph structure in these posts.

Anna said...

Thank you! That's the best compliment I've received all day.

Rarian Rakista said...

Square mirrors are for squares is probably what is going through these guy's minds.

However, there is a lot to be said for interesting mirror configurations. I personally like the porthole mirrors with faux brasswork around them.

yummarksthespot.com said...

Hilaaaaaaariousss.

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