We'd catch the first showing of Adam Sandler's terrible movie Jack & Jill at like, 11:30am.
Then we'd run a weird errand where we had to stop by a sketchy strip club because he has to pick something up from his ex-girlfriend who works there. And, even though he says that we'll only be there for "two minutes," I end up sitting at the bar by myself for a half-hour, not knowing what's taking him so long.
Then he'd insist that we grab greasy chicken bowls from some random KFC for a late lunch/ early dinner which is doubly gross because I don't eat fast food but he's a picky eater and it's the only thing he'll eat.
Then we'd go to some shitty bar that only serves Bud Light and smells like a homeless man's farts mingled with stale cigarette smoke. He loves the place because he can smoke freely, but I'd be bummed that my clothes and hair are gonna smell like ass now. Good thing I wore my favorite fancy perfume for this stupid date! (Not.)
Then, he'd eat a pickled egg from a giant jar and try to kiss me.
And, after I've rebuffed his advances, he'd confess that he's actually engaged to this girl but that they have an "open relationship so it's cool."
That, my friends, would be my worst date of all time.
What would be yours? Tell me in the comments.