July 31, 2009

Hotlined and Fancy Free

(Sing this to the tune of Queen's "We Are The Champions")
We have a hotline, my friends
And, we'll keep on calling 'til the end
We have a hotline
We have a hotline
No time for losers
'Cause we have a hotline
...of the world!
Alright, that last line of the song didn't really fit but whatever. Behold:

Yup, our number is (215) 25 Dudez, ((215)-253-8339), because that's how many guys it'll take to get a party started. It's like a party minyan (that's a Jewish joke.) Could you imagine if you had 25 guys calling you? It'd be mandemonium, which is a contraction of "man" and "pandemonium" and it's what we call it when we go through some sort of monsoon season of attraction and every guy we meet seems to be interested in us. The "z" at the end is just the right amount of shade flippin' wackiness. There you go. And so, (215) 25 Dudez was born.

We signed up for this number through Google Voice last night and, truth be told, we're excited about the possibilities. Call or text us a message offering your suggestions for Tip Our Hats, Bonerkillers, Quick Rants, or anything else we usually cover. Tell us a joke. Ask us about when we're gonna announce our Speed Dating parties. [The answer: we're going to make an announcement very soon. There, we just saved you a dime.] Let us know if you're on a terrible date while you are on the date. Hell, ask us out on a date!

Drunk dial, meet (215) 25 DUDEZ. (215) 25 DUDEZ, meet drunk dialing. Whatever you do, just play nice.

Moving forward, we will use this number to give updates about our speed dating parties and any other events we might throw in the future. Maybe we'll use it to announce contests or give you sneak peeks into what we're working on. It's all fun.

(Now, say this line in your best Tobias Funke voice)
Let the great Shmitten Kitten hotline experiment begin!


thesimplicity said...

Is it cool if I set all of my various ex's mobile numbers to this? You'll end up with some fairly hilarious (read: sad) drunk dials.

Anna said...

Yes! As Kurt Cobain once pleaded, "here we are now, entertain us!"

G+G said...

This is pretty much a dream come true. You would not believe the disasters G&G encounters on a nightly basis. Except now, you will have to believe it because we're gonna text you all about it.

Anna said...

G+G, bring it on. This is gonna be so much fun! I'm gonna drunk dial the hot line too. Soooo much better than sending the texts I'll wanna send circa 2:15am.

Diane said...

i can attest to the awesome-ness of this hotline. i desperately needed to vent out my worry of being stood up. i got a text message back giving me solidarity and back-up! hell yeah! (p.s. he ended up being stuck in traffic, damn you 405 freeway!) thanks, shmitten kitten! you truly are my favorite blog. :)

Diane said...

let's hope this isn't also a "shoulda known" red flag moment! ;) my constant fear ever since i read that post... hahaha...

Sprizouse said...

There's no waaaaay I can dial 215-DUDEZ to ask one of these sexy Schmitten Kittens on a date. Can I petition to get it changed to 215-Kittens or 215-Smitten or 215-Hotties or 215-UpYours or something???

Anna said...

Diane, I'm so happy your night turned around for the better! Sweet.

@Sprizouse I spent no less than a half hour trying to come up with some combination of ktns, shmtn, girls, girlz, etc. But, they didn't have it available, at least with a (215) area code. I chose DUDEZ cause it sounds wacky and its more general. The "Z" makes it gender neutral.

I also chose it at 3am and it seemed like a good idea at the time. Oh, and there's a $10 fee to change the number. If you wanna pay that, be my guest.

We've always used words as a gender-bender. I mean, we call our turn-offs bonerkillers. I'll have to reflect on the implications of this. For all of you Women's Studies majors out there, let me know if you have any theories.

Anna said...

@Sprizouse With that said, you can still totally ask us out. It ain't no thing but a chicken wing on a string.

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