November 5, 2009

Bonerkiller: Appointment TV Watchers

"Awww, I'd love to see you on Wednesday night but Lost is on then. Can we switch our date to Thursday?" I'd attribute the quote to the guy who said this but I forgot his name because I erased his number from my phone many, many moons ago.

If a guy postpones a date with me because his favorite TV show is on, well, then, I don't even know what to tell him. Not only did he admit that a TV show determined his social schedule, but he's also told me that interacting with a real, live woman with boobs comes secondary to the warm glow of his beloved boob tube. With the availability of shows online, it takes, like, zero effort to watch his precious TV show on the computer at any time. He really had to watch it the exact minute it airs? Did he bet money on the outcome or something? 

I guess I should commend his honesty, although I would've preferred if he had just lied to me. He should've said that he had to have dinner with his parents or that he had to grab drinks for his roommate's girlfriend's birthday. Hell, he could even tell me that he has a boil on his ball that needed urgent medical attention; that would make me feel better than being one-upped by a TV show.

He doesn't even have to lie; he could just finesse the truth and say, "Hey, I'm not feeling well. Can we scoot our date 'til tomorrow." Bam! Not only is he off the hook, but he has a dash of sympathy too. That's a win/win. But, he didn't do that. He'd rather me lose my respect for him than miss his show. I see.

Ten bucks says that he'll act shocked when I'm unwilling to reschedule our magical date. Um, he basically just told me that he'd rather flop around on his couch in his Umbros than see the twinkle gleamimg off my smile and the sunshine beaming off my hair. Lame!

[Confession: I was this intense about watching Dawson's Creek in college. I also never got any action in college. Coincidence? You be the judge.]


12 comments:

tanukichu said...

A: This has happened to me and it's irritating as hell.
B: Nice video. Bwahahahahaha. Gotta love Black Flag.

Amanda said...

This is actually not a bonerkiller for me, but it's probably only because I'm one of these people. But even I know that that's what dvrs are for.

Noel said...

I'd postpone a date to watch The Next Iron Chef. Which is probably why I'm single. But I'm ok with that. At least Alton brown doesn't judge me.

Fritsky said...

I loved Dawson's Creek in college too! Let's have a Dawson's marathon!

miss bee said...

i once invited a boy over to my place and he said, "no, i'm watching dragonball z."

DRAGON
BALL
Z

i think that's anime. i know it's a cartoon.

i am still miffed about it, and it was roughly eight years ago.

Diane said...

oh for the love of... TIVO. LOOK INTO IT. hell, even a VCR with one lone tape you reuse over and over again would work.
Miss Bee, you made my jaw drop. correct usage of the term "boy" there. yes, it's an anime. plus, it sucks. i would stay miffed about that too.

allarevessels said...

i invited a girl over to watch a porn once. that was awesome.

Anna said...

Actually, on my first date with my high school sweetheart, we went back to his house with our buddy Ed and we watched a scene from a porn. He said that there was a funny rap in it that he wanted to show me. I was too freaked out to be in his bedroom to pay attention to the screen. Shrug.

Two major things happened that I overlooked:
1. Bringing a friend along to our first date.
2. Making me watch a scene from a porn with him on our first date.

So, why'd I stick around? He had a zine, a car and worked in a record store. Case closed.

Tender Branson said...

This can not only kill a boner, but a friendship as well.

allarevessels said...

killing friends with boners

Anna said...

Uh, making friends with boners.

tobes the wonder dog said...

my best friend and i watch some shows on the phone together since we live far. i think it makes our friendship cool and lame, because we are very dark and intense people who pause our lives for gossip girl and degrassi.

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