March 16, 2010

Real Talk: Making The Shoebox Cut

Making it into the "shoebox stage" of a relationship is a pretty big deal. This is when we start to save little things reminiscent of our outtings together. It's when we start caring enough to want to be reminded of all those sweet things at a later time. I've had shoeboxes filled with all sorts of things: mini-golf score sheets, movie/concert/Phillies ticket stubs, photo-booth photos, ice cream sundae receipts, beer coasters, basically anything that I find in my purse at the end of the night that relates to our date.

We've mentioned that if you hand-write your number it has a pretty good chance of landing in the shoebox, or at least we'll smile at your effort before throwing it away. Guys will never see this shoebox 'cause its hidden in the back of a closet and harder to get to than One-Eyed Willy's treasure, but you can be pretty sure that the shoebox exists. It's like a relationship diary in scraps and trash instead of actual words.

The best thing about having a shoebox of memories, is that if it doesn't work out, you get to destroy all those things ala Tai trying to ditch her "Rollin' With the Homies" cassette in Cher's fireplace. Seriously, for those of you who never saved scraps of relationship shit, you should try it. Then let us know how cool it feels to burn that shit up or dump it in the ocean later. Trust us, it feels awesome.

What's the weirdest thing you've ever shoeboxed from a significant other? And what's the best way to destroy it? Get at us in the comments.

11 comments:

Anna said...

The weirdest thing in my shoebox is from a guy who drew his graffiti name (aka his tag) on a sticker. It's stupid, but everytime I see it, I smile.

rowdy said...

my fiance was at my house around the holidays and stumbled across a couple ex-boxes that i had been derelict in destroying...

shit got really awkward when under the photos, napkins, redsox tickets and what-not there was a shiny, gold, MAGNUM condom. oopsies.

Lora said...

destroying the box is pivotal! especially if it contains a condom, Rowdy. although I have to admit I can't let go of some things in my old shoeboxes.

Once I drove 2 hours to the shore at midnight w/ a close friend to help her dump her shoebox belongings off the pier where she first met her boyfriend. The sense of calm/closure after getting rid of that stuff is amazing!

rowdy said...

Lora, that's amazing! i should be more dramatic about the process. I did destroy the box... but it was an unceremonious dropping of the box into the garbage.

Meg said...

The weirdest thing in my shoebox is a top from the little containers that you get beta fish in, which was a Valentine's day present from one of my exes.

I've never destroyed a box. I like looking through the old memories now that they're well behind me in the past. I do go to great lengths to hide them, though. And while there might be condoms in my boxes, they aren't ever anything special (except for the ONE condom in the same beta box that looks like an ancient Roman coin. But that shit's just awesome).

polianarchy said...

Destroy? No. I just threw it all into plastic bags and handed it over to him as I kicked him out.

melanie said...

Maybe it's because I'm from Washington state, but I couldn't throw that shit out.

I recycled it.

Kat said...

My shoe box burnings (Yes, multiple. Yes, always fire.) have always been crazy cathartic! Nothing says "it's over" for me like having a bonfire consisting soley of receipts from dinners I paid for and that douchetastic hoodie "to remember you by". You may not keep me warm at night anymore, but your stuff is a pretty good substitute!

Anonymous said...

Weirdest thing? No joke-vial of his blood on a necklace. Imagine my surprise getting that as a gift. And we weren't a goth/vampire couple, either.

I can't destroy my box, either. Possibly because I am on good terms with my exes, but I just love going through that thing once in a while and laughing at how dumb I was.

juliannalose said...

The weirdest thing in my shoebox is the photos of my sister's ex boyfriends. She was diligent in destroying old boxes, but couldn't part with some funny old photos of the guys. That's where I came in. Eventually I ended up just making a shoebox dedicated to photos of old ex's of hers and mine. Just be sure to keep it well hidden!

Kehilla Monster said...

I had an apron that a guy bought me when he was in Argentina. An apron. I could tell by the fabric and shitty design that he got it for $7 at an airport before he boarded the plane.

It felt so good to see it in my trashcan underneath Pepe's Mexican and coffee grinds.

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