July 26, 2010

Story Time: His Artwork Ain't Workin' For Me

Not to sound weird, but I've been in my fair share of guys' bedrooms. (Ahem.) It's always a crapshoot because who knows what kind of weird shit he'll have on his walls passing off as artwork?

Will he take his cues from Mr. Belevedere's room and affix tasteful pictures to the wall? Will his room have peeling band posters slapped up half-hazardly? Maybe something bizarre scoured from a thrift store? Maybe *gag* a framed football jersey looming large?

Maybe the walls will be bare, making me feel like I'm committed to a mental institution every time I step foot in there.

The worst artwork I've ever seen in a guy's bedroom was a Sublime poster with a black light underneath it. The Sublime poster was dorky enough, but coupled with the black light pushed the entire set-up into another realm of terrible. I made him turn on the blacklight for kicks and it felt like I was in the rave episode of Dawson's Creek.   

What's the WORST thing passing for artwork that you've seen hung up in his room? Tell me in the comments.


Anonymous said...

a framed velvet crying clown. so creepy!!

Anonymous said...

An Akira poster in a very very expensive custom frame next to a shelf full of creepy anime figurines of horrible mutant robot monsters and big boobied school girls.

Anonymous said...

nothin wrong with big boobied school girls

Zilla said...

Ugh, come on.
Sexy girls in bikinis, washing sports cars in high heels. And beer.

I am not one to be offended by the subject matter itself. I am offended by the mind which would be so eager as to hang such a thing on a wall.
Way to be tacky and boring, brah.
I guess after a late night you would need something to come home to. Something to get your mind off of that vicious game of beer pong and that DUI.

Now, a guy who would hang an illustration of planetary gravity wells and the Star Wars (IV, V, VI) plot map on his bedroom wall? Prolly a worth sticking around for.

Anonymous said...

A framed snapshot of him and an X-rated film 'starlet' apparently taken at some kind of porno convention meet 'n greet.
(It was on his dresser, not the wall, does that count?)

Anonymous said...

mounted medieval weapons and a small pile of dime bags with batman symbols on them

roboconcept said...

plastic stars transplanted from the ceiling of my childhood bedroom. Points/No Points?

Anonymous said...

any poster found at spencer's at the mall...the one with the million different pictures of shots. yeah...cool if you were 15.

ANYTHING pot leaf decorated and you are officially ditched. i dont care if you smoke or not, that is so tacky.

Chelsea Rae said...

An extremely bizarre six foot by eight foot canvas, painted by his landlady (she was one of those women who got really into painting after she retired). The painting was of a person in a living room talking on a telephone, and another person entering the room. The perspective was horribly off and the figures were flat and out of proportion...but they had those eyes that followed you? The best part was that he tried really unsuccessfully to drape a 3 foot by four foot Irish flag over it. Fail.

Alan said...

Never did see the point in wall art myself; there are so many better things you can do with your money!

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