September 17, 2010

Surprisingly Not a Bonerkiller: Over-orderers

While I order one lone entree like a boring person, he's hopscotching through the menu, asking for apps, sides, and main courses willy nilly. My eyes grow wider as he rattles off his selections to the waitress. When I tell him that there's no way that he can eat so much food in one sitting, he shrugs it off and says, "I wanted to try it all." He's not kidding!

The best is when the food comes and we have to rearrange the table to accommodate his feast. He's dabbling in the mac and cheese, chomping on the grilled asparagus, then diving into his pot of Belgian-style mussels. It's a veritable smorgasbord up in here!

I honestly think it's cute when a guy orders too much. After dating so many picky eaters, I admire his willingness to try a range of foods. He doesn't finish his meal, not even close, but he always seems happy to have sampled so many options. In a weird way, even though he orders so much, he knows exactly what he wants. And, I like that. A lot.


Eric E. said...

I was having a little snack when I saw this, so obviously I read it with a strong sexual undertone. I realize innuendo is pretty standard with food writing, but this piece has left me with a nagging question. To wit --"diving into a bearded mussel" and "chomping on a limp asparagus" are strong images on their own and require no explication. But what would your partner be doing if he/she was "dabbling in your mac & cheese." Yum! So creamy...

BTW -- I seem to remember hearing the following food-based rap lyrics somewhere, but I've never been able to find the actual song. Maybe someone will recognize a few lines, as follows:

Back in the day I knew this girl named Brandi
She was all up in my nuts and candy
Lickin' and slurpin' like you wouldn't believe
And when I was done I said Yo b**** just leave!

Ring a bell????

Anna said...

Eric, I swear to god, reading your comment made me feel like I was drunk.

dd said...

my head hurts, help us eric. you make-a no sense-a.

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