Minor quibble: my ultimate boyfriend wouldn't A) wear a shirt proclaiming his ultimate boyfriend status B) his voice wouldn't sound like mine, only digitally distorted and C) his hair wouldn't look like a badger's taint.
|Sweet Talkin' Ken, the self-proclaimed Ultimate Boyfriend|
But, now that I know that such a thing/person/toy exists, I can only wonder what kinds of things I'd program my ultimate boyfriend to say. Right off the top of my head, I'd make him spit out:
- You look amazing in flats.
- Is this pop-punk? Well then, TURN IT UP!
- Wanna lay around and watch reality TV? Cool, me too.
- Go have fun with your friends. Just text me when you're drunk and want attention and I'll come meet you wherever you are.
- Mexican food for the third time this week? Sure, count me in!
This lovely image was sent to me via my sister Sarah, who's always looking out for me. Thanks, bud!