June 9, 2011

Things I'm Terrible At: Having Nice Legs In The Summer


I've come to terms with the fact that within a two days of summer weather, I will undoubtedly bruise my legs in the dumbest ways. I don't get it. I'm not Ariel; you'd think that I'd figure out how to have human legs by now. Well, it turns out that I haven't because as soon as it's skirt weather, my legs look like they've been in Fight Club.

I scratched at a mosquito bite when I was sleeping so I have a scab on my thigh. I ran into my bed and bruised my ankle. I knocked my knee getting out of my car. It's physically impossible to keep my legs looking pristine!

The worst is when I'm out with a guy and I catch him eying my scrapes. I'll quickly re-cross my legs so he won't see my scabs which is weird. Every other part of my body can deal with being exposed to sunlight except my legs. It's like they're bruise magnets. He probably thinks I'm into roller derby or ladies' wrestling or getting into heated brawls with feral cats, but the truth is that I'm just a clumsy motherfucker with some jacked up gams. Sorry!


boldaslove said...

i am the EXACT SAME! I absolutely hate it, I feel like they should be all tanned and golden and instead they are pasty and bruised.

Julia H. said...

I've had this issue too. Usually it's from hiking or playing sports, so I just hope it comes off as athletic and not that I look like the victim of a beating.

Ashley said...

SAME PROBLEM. Though I think I get bruises like that year round.... they're just.... visible in the summer... that and I HATE shaving my legs.... which has to occur more often now as well!

Ega said...

Oh my God, I am the same. It's really, really shameful. I fall down a LOT and my legs are covered in bruises and scrapes and stuff from that. So, it's not even like I have a good excuse. When people look at them, I usually just yell " I FELL DOWN, OKAY!?"

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