|I will chuck him clear across this theater with zero hesitation|
I swear to god, if he leans in and whispers in my ear more than once about anything happening on-screen, I will take this medium-sized bag of popcorn and jam it up his goddam piehole. He'll be sneezing popcorn for the next five years if he doesn't shut his trap on the double.
And, I don't care if it's just the previews! Once the lights dim, his mouth needs to stop moving. Sure, this is a highly-edited three-minute preview of a movie I probably won't see unless I'm hungover on a Sunday sometime in 2014 and it's playing on one of several Cinemax channels, but whatever. Once we hear that old guy say in the preview, "In a time when," he needs to relegate his mouth to Jujufruit chewing and Diet Coke sipping and THAT'S IT!