August 20, 2012

Story Time: How Do You Feel About Bald Guys?

I have a lot of "types" that I gravitate towards. Some look like Seth Green, some look like Jason Schwartzman. Once in a blue moon, I'll rope in a Kevin Connolly-ish cutie pie (He played Eric aka "E" on Entourage. Side note: I wonder what he's up to now. You think he'd go out with me? What if I offered him say, $100? $200? What if I promised to give him a foot rub while we were on the date? He might say yes just on the novelty factor of that alone. Alright, I just creeped myself out so let's move on.)

I've never been into say, a Bruce Willis or a Vin Diesel-type. Bald guys are an entirely new enchilada for me, dating type-wise. There's a lot that I don't know!

My first question: is it okay to touch his head when we kiss? Does he mind? Am I supposed to be caressing his sparkly dome at any point? I'm used to grabbing a full-ish head of hair when the spirit moves me. How do you steer a bald guy around? Am I supposed to grab his ears? I'm clueless here.

Just between us, it's a little strange to caress a dude's bald head. It feels like I'm cupping a dinosaur egg which is cool--don't get me wrong--but I'm not sure that I'd classify cupping a dinosaur egg as sexy. I don't know what to do with his bald head and I'm too nervous to ask. Should I kiss it at any point? It feels like I'm kissing a kneecap. I'm intimidated!

What do you think about bald dudes? Are you pro or con? Do you think that they're hotter than their longer-tressed counterparts? Tell me in the comments!

7 comments:

The Tall One said...

I 100% agree with your feelings on the matter, and they were exactly how I felt about it... until... I met a 1/2 bald-so-he-shaves-his-head guy this summer who swept me off my feet.
The first time we kissed I was highly aware of not allowing my hands to venture above the neck, as I was pretty sure I would ruin the moment with my squealing of how it felt, followed by a scientific exploration of continually patting his scalp like a 2 year old with a puppy, until I felt comfortable. I avoided it at all costs.
However, the 2nd time we kissed I ended up placing my hand on his egg head kind of by accident (caught in the moment and whatnot,) and instead of a shrill cry of "what the hell is this?" I was surprised to find it felt intimate and weirdly nice.
Now I'm used to it, and feel like it may have started a new quality I find highly attractive in the opposite sex.
(Bonus points: he's shorter than me... ha.)
THE END.

House of Jules said...

I just DIED laughing at your, "It feels like I'm kissing a kneecap." I've never dated a bald guy, so I don't know from personal experience, but I will say that I think Bruce Willis is sexy as hell, so, SIGN ME UP. ;)

Mallory P. said...

A lot of firefighters are bald. Firefighters are unarguably hot. I rest my case.

Anonymous said...

I love'em. Especially if they have a little bit of just clipped fuzz.

Anonymous said...

The brothers can pull it of but that's it.

Anonymous said...

first guy to give me an orgasm was a premature balder (at 19 - poor dude) so needless to say, I have an extremely positive association with baldness.

Helen said...

I LOVE bald guys! Well, let me specify: not completely bald, but a the lowest setting on the clippers kind of bald. I hate waiting for dudes to do their hair, mostly because they're usually more meticulous about it than I am.
P.S. Use your nails to caress their head, they love that haha

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