I have dietary restrictions. Like, a lot of them. Some of them are legit dietary restrictions: I am allergic to red dye #40 and my stomach is so sensitive that even looking at certain foods has me knocking people down to get to the nearest bathroom. Some of them are related to being an incredibly picky eater. For example, I don’t eat meat, cilantro makes me want to gag and I think shredded lettuce is gross. I’ll admit it: I’m a high maintenance eater.
I'm with ya, Darlene!
This often poses a problem with dating, as I’m not interested in telling a guy that I’ve just met, “Well, actually I can’t eat anything on that menu because I’m vegetarian and everything else might make me shit my pants.” I prefer to avoid this all together and just meet a dude for drinks, but lately dinner dates seem to be all the rage. Most guys don’t even think about this kind of thing when planning a date and some just consider me to be a pain in the ass because of it. I usually get stuck ordering something that I hate and pushing it around my plate. One asshole even declined a second date because he was uncomfortable with the fact that I have the eating habits of a fussy child. Thanks, guy.
So imagine my surprise when my most recent dating prospect followed up asking me out on a date with this query: “Do you have any dietary restrictions? Vegetarian, Vegan, strict carnivore, allergic to everything under the sun?” What??!! Where did you come from, you thoughtful, thoughtful man?!
My first reaction was to set a date for our wedding, but instead I said yes to dinner next week at a restaurant with lots of options for me. I’ll be spending the next several days trying not daydream about all of the food I’m going to eat and coming up with ways to keep myself from asking for his hand in marriage. It’s going to be really hard to not think about the food.