April 5, 2010

Things In His House That Make Me Glad: A Giant Bottle of Sriracha Sauce


Like Biz Markie sang, you've got what I neeeeeeed. And, I need some Sriracha sauce. I have a lot of hot sauce requirements, and this is one of them. And, it's radical when a guy steps up to the hot sauce plate.

We'll get some Chinese food delivered to his house and my noods (noodles) will need a bit of a kick. Before the words have left my mouth, he'll sprint up from his seat and produce the bottle of cock sauce faster than you can say "cream of someyoungguy." Honestly, if he were a superhero, his superpower would be to produce the Sriacha bottle in a flash.

 I've given up hope that a guy will have the following stocked in his house: fluffy towels, emergency stashes of candy, and/or sunscreen that hasn't expired. That's fine. I've come to terms with that.

However, knowing that he has a bottle of this stuff on hand makes it all semi-tolerable. I'll overlook his barren cupboards as long as he has a bottle of this spicy condiment tucked away in his fridge for kickin' up our takeout. Shine on, you crazy, Sriracha sauce-loving diamond.

10 comments:

JP Toto said...

Doh. I fail.

Anna said...

haha, JP!

thewegger said...

I can somehow avoid food shopping for months at a time, but whenever this runs out, I replace it within 24 hours. Must have.

Blue Light J said...

I think Sriracha can actually be used as sunscreen in a pinch.

Anonymous said...

Something weird and horrible has got to happen to you if one consumes a bottle of this shit once a week.

Danny said...

Srirachi fucking rocks, I buy it wholesale at Asian shops so I never run out. That stuff has become one of the key ingredients in almost any Spanish dish I make!

Lora said...

Ooooh i'm like this with ketchup. Even weirder than not having hot sauce is not having ketchup. dealbreaker.

xkatzelmacherx said...

"I've given up hope that a guy will have the following stocked in his house: fluffy towels, emergency stashes of candy, and/or sunscreen that hasn't expired. That's fine. I've come to terms with that."

I have all that and Sriracha and still can't get a date to save my life.

Anonymous said...

^ Waaaaaaaaaah

Anna said...

Hahaha

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