November 24, 2010

Things In His House That Make Me Sad: His Ex-Girlfriend's Tampons That Are Still In His Closet

Pic taken from
From Erin, who doesn't need to see the tampons from girlfriends past.
I'm extremely pleased that he doesn't get that icky feeling when the words "tampon" or "cramps" are introduced into our dinner conversation. Maybe he grew up with cool sisters or has a politically active mother or maybe he read the Feminine Mystique once in college. However, he crossed the line from an being an open-minded gentlemen to a slightly-odd punk when I found an old box of tampons in his junk drawer. They were nestled in amongst his scotch tape and dental floss. Great.

Your ex-girlfriend is gone, buddy, and so is her Aunt Flow. He either doesn't do much spring cleaning, or he is convinced that if the funsticks stay, she'll somehow come back, retrieve them, and give him another shot. Either that or he is trying to send a message to any woman who enters his bedroom: this is a no-babymaking lair.

I do him the courtesy of not wearing my ex-boyfriends' t-shirts when he's around, I would think that courtesy would extend both ways.
It's funny; this happened to me once. I found a crusty, corroded box of Tampax waaaay in the back of my dude's bathroom closet. I fished 'em out and said something like, "You planning on making some vampire tea later?" He said, "Ew, gross. Those are like, a million years old. Toss that shit away." So I did, with relish. Ya hear me? WITH RELISH!


Anonymous said...

Wow, deja vu. I dated a guy who kept a box of tampons in his bathroom closet because, he said, he read in a men's magazine once that guys should keep them around as a 'courtesy' to women who might be staying over. Um, yeah. No.

Anonymous said...

YES. The worst guy I ever dated made a big deal out of how we didn't need to go to the store, his ex had this huge freezer bag of 'that time of the month' needs: Tampons (an icky brand I don't like), all these pills. I was desperate, so went for it. Then he said, "They should be fine, your vaginas are all the same, anyway."

Anonymous said...

OMG above poster, that is a horrible story. one shady ex bf of mine had an old tampax box too. the reaction TO the box of tampons is the most important part.

lowlights said...

Tampon and ketchup - maybe. Tampon and relish - no.

Post a Comment