April 13, 2012

Bonerkiller: Guys That Say "Thank You" To Me After We Kiss

No, THANK YOU for saying something weird
after we just played tonsil hockey
After a passionate liplocking, please don't disengage, smile, and softly coo, "Mmmm. That was nice. Thank you." There's no need to thank me for kissing you. That's fucking dumb.

I don't know why that little "thank you" gets under my skin so much, but it does. It's pathetic, like why wouldn't I want to kiss him? Do people not kiss him a lot? Why? Is there something I should know? Was his face used for a gonorrhea ad or something and he didn't tell me? Is he related to Hitler? My wheels are spinnin', man!

And, what am I supposed to say in response to his gratitude? "You're welcome"? "That'll be five bucks, Mister"? "Actually, your Dad's a better kisser"? See what I mean? Ugh. I don't even want to look at him anymore.

I don't know if he saw someone say it once in a rom-com or what, but he's gotta retire the post-kiss "thank you" immediately because it totally ruined the mood. Whatever. Let's just enjoy the silence as Depeche Mode instructed us.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

I feel ya. My ex-boyfriend once thanked me after a hand job. it was so fucking weird.

/Maria

Anonymous said...

thank you.

Josh said...

I prefer to thank a lady who's kissed me by kissing her again. Maybe it's just me.

Anonymous said...

Does the guy in question not have English as his first language? I ask not to be rude, but I've dated two women for whom this was the case, who both said "thank you" after a kiss (and an orgasm).

Anna said...

A lot of guys say this to me; not one. And, they're all English-speaking Americans so I don't think that was a factor. But, good guess!

Clifford Allen said...

Hmm. I used to do this too, the thanking. I think it is the niceness gene.

shy said...

hahaha, I hate that too. It's so awkward, like he didn't know what to do next or something. And I don't know about you, but in my experience, they usually say it in a weird, low, trying to be sexy, kind of voice that turns me off even more.

Anna said...

Yes! That low voice is a groaner.

Solo4114 said...

My bet: they think they're being chivalrous/gentlemanly. If an expression of any sort is required, a simple "Wow" would work better.

Anonymous said...

Andy's face in the GIF is perfect for the rant!! Hehe, love it!

nora said...

reallllly connecting to your blog on a deep level right now.

Post a Comment