|Seriously, this was his freezer in ass cheek-form|
There was nothing in it! How can his freezer be so bare? Did he just move into his house four hours ago? I was expecting a half-empty bottle of Smirnoff, a bag of vegetable dumplings from Trader Joe's that he never got around to making and a limp bag of frozen peas, but nothing? Are we in a doll's house? Is this fridge even turned on?
While having a bare freezer was semi-alarming on it's own, more distressingly, there were no ice cube trays. How am I supposed to chill my beverage with this egregious lack of ice? My whiskey on the rocks is now sadly, disappointingly, regrettably sans rocks. Fuck that noise! I can't go through life with all of my beverages served neat. I'm just not that kind of girl. *lone tear falls down my face*
I didn't realize how much I liked having ice in my life until it was taken away so abruptly. On a scale of one to pumpkin patch-themed photo shoot, how crazy would I appear if I brought my own ice cube trays over to his house? Hell, I'd even go for a jokey ice cube tray he bought for a Halloween party six years ago at this point, anything to chill this cocktail I'm hastily assembling before we head out for dinner.
I slammed his empty freezer door in frustration and was surprised at how light his door felt. It was like trying to slam a styrofoam cup down on a table. That annoyed me too. Fuck this surprisingly light freezer door to hell! Get some ice cube trays up in here, sir. I like to chill my drinks while we chill. Is that so wrong?