I went to The Ritz with this incredibly hot guy who I had been in love with since forever. I decided to see Paris Je T'aime with him because I thought it would be the perfect date movie. Since I didn't want us to miss the movie, I made up a lie about not being hungry. In hindsight, that was a Bad Idea.I'm not a professionally trained medical professional or anything, but it seems like eating a slice of 'za before the movie could've saved your entire relationship. Well, if a guy can't laugh at your growlin' tummy or at least offer to go grab you guys some popcorn, then he doesn't sound like much fun anyway. Down with growlin' tummy non-laughers and popcorn non-grabbers!
Throughout the film, my stomach made the strangest noises imaginable and I tried everything I could to cover them up. I was soooo embarrassed because everyone in the theater could hear 'em. I fidgeted in my seat and just felt really uncomfortable about it. Meanwhile, my "date" kept falling asleep during the film. After the movie, I wanted to crawl under one of the seats and die either from embarrassment or starvation, possibly both combined.
We awkwardly parted ways at the train. He called me the next day and told me how how much of a good time he didn't have. I lied and said that I was really depressed and that I wasn't really ready to "hang out" with him. I guess lying isn't my strong suit. It was a nightmare! I am really good friends with this guy now but I refuse to go on any solo dates with him in fear of my stomach doing back flips.
March 24, 2009
We received this reader submission from Attia. It's almost like an afterschool special about what NOT to do on a movie date: